1 00:00:59,597 --> 00:01:02,031 - Excuse me young man - Si senora 2 00:01:02,157 --> 00:01:04,546 - Are you in Mr. Brown's class? - Por favore 3 00:01:05,037 --> 00:01:09,189 Mr. Brown's class! Brown! Mr. Brown 4 00:01:09,317 --> 00:01:12,150 Ah si! Juan Cervantes 5 00:01:14,637 --> 00:01:17,549 Yes, but are you in Mr. Brown's class? 6 00:01:18,077 --> 00:01:20,910 - English as a foreign language? - Por favore? 7 00:01:21,917 --> 00:01:23,987 Are you really as stupid as you look? 8 00:01:26,117 --> 00:01:27,186 Excuse me 9 00:01:27,317 --> 00:01:29,273 You are in Mr. Brown's class, aren't you? 10 00:01:29,997 --> 00:01:31,430 Are you or aren't you? 11 00:01:35,077 --> 00:01:37,955 - Doesn't Mr. Brown teach you anything? - Por favore? 12 00:01:38,997 --> 00:01:41,113 - You - Yes please Missy 13 00:01:42,317 --> 00:01:44,956 Can l be assisting you in any way whatsoever? 14 00:01:45,037 --> 00:01:46,789 At last a breakthrough 15 00:01:47,237 --> 00:01:52,550 - Are you in Mr. Brown's class? - No, l'm in corridor 16 00:01:54,077 --> 00:01:56,955 - Do you think you could give him a message - Certainly 17 00:01:57,117 --> 00:02:01,235 - l am Miss Courtney - l am Ranjeet Singh 18 00:02:01,597 --> 00:02:04,953 Just at this particularl moment, l'm not really bothered in who you are 19 00:02:05,037 --> 00:02:07,073 l just want you to give Mr. Brown a message 20 00:02:07,197 --> 00:02:10,030 l will be very happy to comply with your request 21 00:02:10,157 --> 00:02:12,068 Would you tell Mr. Brown l would like a word with him 22 00:02:12,157 --> 00:02:13,192 Most certainly 23 00:02:13,917 --> 00:02:15,191 Which word would you like? 24 00:02:16,997 --> 00:02:19,431 Just say l want to speak to him 25 00:02:21,317 --> 00:02:22,796 Foreigners! 26 00:02:23,917 --> 00:02:24,872 Quiet please! 27 00:02:25,997 --> 00:02:26,952 Settle down! 28 00:02:30,597 --> 00:02:33,555 Good evening 29 00:02:35,917 --> 00:02:38,954 So we appear to be some missing l hope they haven't dropped out 30 00:02:39,077 --> 00:02:41,113 Please it would not be surprising me 31 00:02:41,637 --> 00:02:47,075 l am always thinking that Sikh, son of Guru, was a Punjabi drop out 32 00:02:47,637 --> 00:02:51,073 l am hearing what you are saying, you miserable spawn of ajackal 33 00:02:52,117 --> 00:02:54,551 Don't you two start again! Actually, you're late 34 00:02:55,037 --> 00:02:59,030 A thousand apologies for this unforgivable tardiness 35 00:02:59,157 --> 00:03:03,230 But we were all unavoidably detained in the corridor by a lady 36 00:03:03,357 --> 00:03:04,267 Si, si 37 00:03:04,917 --> 00:03:08,034 Do l take it Juan that you understood what Ranjeet was saying? 38 00:03:08,157 --> 00:03:10,068 - Por favor? - Sorry i asked 39 00:03:11,117 --> 00:03:13,153 Who was this lady who detained you in the corridor? 40 00:03:13,277 --> 00:03:17,475 Oh blimey! l am forgetting her name 41 00:03:18,077 --> 00:03:21,513 She was big lady. Very large bosoms 42 00:03:23,037 --> 00:03:24,993 Grandioso, very good! 43 00:03:26,117 --> 00:03:28,915 Yes, well while you are trying to remember her name, perhaps you'd better sit down 44 00:03:30,077 --> 00:03:33,786 Now l hope you've all done your homework 45 00:03:34,157 --> 00:03:40,995 Excuse me please! l am remembering the name! Missy Courtney 46 00:03:41,117 --> 00:03:43,551 - Miss Courtney - Yes absolutely 47 00:03:43,917 --> 00:03:45,987 The lady with the large bosoms 48 00:03:47,117 --> 00:03:49,870 - She is wanting to see you - Well, she'll just have to wait 49 00:03:49,997 --> 00:03:53,114 Excuse me please! She is already waiting 50 00:03:54,037 --> 00:03:57,234 She may be the principal but l have a class to teach! Now as l was saying... 51 00:03:59,117 --> 00:04:03,986 Ah Miss large... Miss Courtney 52 00:04:04,117 --> 00:04:07,826 - l was just on my way to see you actually - That's not the impression l got 53 00:04:07,957 --> 00:04:10,232 - l shan't be a moment class - lt's all right, don't bother 54 00:04:10,357 --> 00:04:13,190 l'm here only to tell you that you can expect another student 55 00:04:13,317 --> 00:04:17,549 - Jolly good! The more the merrier - You're not here to make merry Mr. Brown 56 00:04:17,917 --> 00:04:19,236 No, it was just a figure of speech 57 00:04:19,357 --> 00:04:22,030 You'd better try to teach a few figures of speech to your students 58 00:04:22,157 --> 00:04:24,512 - They seem to be in need of it - l'm doing my best 59 00:04:26,317 --> 00:04:28,114 - Miss Courtney? - Yes 60 00:04:28,237 --> 00:04:30,990 This new student! What nationality can l expect? 61 00:04:31,117 --> 00:04:33,995 - African - African! Thank you 62 00:04:34,637 --> 00:04:39,506 Remember, i asked you to write an essay or short story about your life here in England 63 00:04:40,037 --> 00:04:41,834 l hope you've all done so, have you? 64 00:04:42,117 --> 00:04:45,996 Good, good! l'll go round the class and ask each of you to read out what you've written 65 00:04:46,117 --> 00:04:47,835 Anna, should we start with you? 66 00:04:49,197 --> 00:04:52,985 - My life in England by Anna Schmidt - Good! Very good 67 00:04:56,077 --> 00:04:58,511 - Yeah but go on - There's no more 68 00:04:59,077 --> 00:05:00,226 - You mean that's all there is? - Ya 69 00:05:00,357 --> 00:05:04,236 l half no time to write more! Always that Mrs. Valker is keeping me busy 70 00:05:04,597 --> 00:05:08,988 Anna do this - Anna do that! She is a slavedriver that Mrs Valker 71 00:05:09,117 --> 00:05:10,266 - Walker - Vat? 72 00:05:10,637 --> 00:05:14,915 W is pronounced 'Weh'! Your employer's name is Walker 73 00:05:15,037 --> 00:05:15,947 Ya, Valker 74 00:05:16,677 --> 00:05:20,192 Do you know how many shirts Mrs Valker make me iron last night? 75 00:05:20,557 --> 00:05:22,991 - Walker - Ya Valker 76 00:05:23,117 --> 00:05:26,234 Twelve! Then l had to prepare a meal for the bitch 77 00:05:30,077 --> 00:05:34,070 Anna, she may be a hard taskmistress but l don't think you ought to call her that 78 00:05:34,157 --> 00:05:35,988 - Who? - Mrs. Valker... Walker 79 00:05:37,157 --> 00:05:41,116 - l vas meaning the dog bitch - Oh l see 80 00:05:41,917 --> 00:05:44,954 That is vy l am having no time for the homework 81 00:05:45,077 --> 00:05:48,865 Well, not to worry! You really must concentrate on those 'double u' sounds 82 00:05:51,917 --> 00:05:53,509 Danielle, would you like to read us your essay? 83 00:05:55,157 --> 00:05:56,192 Oui 84 00:05:58,317 --> 00:06:02,947 What l like about England! By Mamselle Danielle Favre 85 00:06:03,077 --> 00:06:06,513 Telephone 2468021 86 00:06:07,157 --> 00:06:08,988 Good! Carry on! 87 00:06:09,117 --> 00:06:10,994 - Scusi - Yes, Giovanni? 88 00:06:11,117 --> 00:06:13,995 Was it 8021 or 8012? 89 00:06:15,597 --> 00:06:18,111 8021 ! Look, never mind what number it was 90 00:06:18,237 --> 00:06:21,195 You're here to improve your English not chat up other students 91 00:06:21,317 --> 00:06:23,228 You are absolutely right Professori! 92 00:06:23,357 --> 00:06:26,952 lt's just l'd like to improve my French as well 93 00:06:27,077 --> 00:06:28,192 You can do that in your own time 94 00:06:28,317 --> 00:06:30,273 - Carry on Danielle - Zank you 95 00:06:31,317 --> 00:06:36,516 l like England because ze grass is so green, and ze pople are so nice 96 00:06:36,917 --> 00:06:37,986 - People - Yes 97 00:06:38,117 --> 00:06:42,030 Especially ze men 98 00:06:43,037 --> 00:06:44,516 Quiet! Quiet 99 00:06:45,637 --> 00:06:52,190 Englishmen are so charming, so handsome and so sexy 100 00:06:55,117 --> 00:06:56,072 Silence please 101 00:06:56,997 --> 00:06:58,953 Yeah, l think that will do Danielle 102 00:06:59,077 --> 00:07:03,548 But l have written much more... all about the things l like to do at night 103 00:07:06,277 --> 00:07:08,074 Yes well, l don't think we'd better go into those 104 00:07:08,677 --> 00:07:10,190 l'll be reading all your essays later 105 00:07:11,117 --> 00:07:13,233 Jamila... l don't suppose you've written anything, have you? 106 00:07:17,037 --> 00:07:18,231 Written... anything? 107 00:07:18,357 --> 00:07:19,915 - No - No 108 00:07:20,037 --> 00:07:24,792 You really must start to speak a little, Jamila... Speak 109 00:07:28,237 --> 00:07:33,152 No, no! ln English! You must try to speak in English 110 00:07:33,277 --> 00:07:35,188 Look! Try saying Good evening 111 00:07:37,917 --> 00:07:41,546 All right, lets start with 'good'! Good, Good 112 00:07:42,597 --> 00:07:47,990 lt's not difficult! Come on! Good, Good 113 00:07:48,677 --> 00:07:51,191 You nearly said it then! Come on! Good 114 00:07:52,637 --> 00:07:53,831 Please! No prompting 115 00:07:59,077 --> 00:08:00,192 Gud 116 00:08:01,317 --> 00:08:02,830 Excellent! Well done 117 00:08:02,957 --> 00:08:04,788 Now try 'evening'! Evening! 118 00:08:05,957 --> 00:08:09,108 lt's not difficult Jamila! Go on! Evening 119 00:08:10,037 --> 00:08:11,152 Yes, yes! Come on 120 00:08:12,317 --> 00:08:13,227 Gud! 121 00:08:13,997 --> 00:08:18,229 l know you can say 'good'! Say 'evening'! Evening 122 00:08:21,117 --> 00:08:26,111 Efening! Efening! Efening 123 00:08:26,237 --> 00:08:27,556 - Good - Efening 124 00:08:27,677 --> 00:08:30,237 Now put them both together! Good evening 125 00:08:33,117 --> 00:08:35,108 Gud efening 126 00:08:36,557 --> 00:08:37,990 Good efening 127 00:08:43,317 --> 00:08:44,989 Very good Jamila 128 00:08:45,117 --> 00:08:47,028 Well done 129 00:08:47,557 --> 00:08:49,070 We'll try some new words later 130 00:08:49,997 --> 00:08:52,192 - Now Su-Lee, have you written anything? - Yes, yes 131 00:08:59,117 --> 00:09:01,233 What l rike about England 132 00:09:02,637 --> 00:09:07,267 England is becoming more porriticarry minded and gladually more reft wing 133 00:09:08,157 --> 00:09:12,992 The overthlow of decadent capitaristic government will soon take prace 134 00:09:13,117 --> 00:09:15,995 As working crasses become more educated 135 00:09:16,117 --> 00:09:19,154 And emblace Communism as the tlue way of rife 136 00:09:21,077 --> 00:09:24,194 Workers levolution getting nealer 137 00:09:24,557 --> 00:09:27,993 With inevitable corrapse of lmpeliaristic bougoise interrectual society 138 00:09:28,637 --> 00:09:29,990 Yes! Well if thats what you like about England 139 00:09:30,117 --> 00:09:31,994 l wouldn't want to hear what you didn't like 140 00:09:33,037 --> 00:09:35,073 - Excuse pleaso - Yes Taro 141 00:09:44,117 --> 00:09:50,795 May l have small observations on youngo radies discourse 142 00:09:51,277 --> 00:09:58,957 Which will also irrustrate incleased knowledge of Engrisho 143 00:09:59,077 --> 00:10:02,035 - Certainly Taro! Go ahead - With lespecto 144 00:10:03,157 --> 00:10:07,992 Youngo rady speak road of cobras 145 00:10:10,077 --> 00:10:12,955 Attitude typical of Fascist Nipponese 146 00:10:13,037 --> 00:10:18,065 Japan civilised countly noto rike China lun by peasanto 147 00:10:18,677 --> 00:10:23,193 - Chinese not peasants - Japanese not Fascisto 148 00:10:25,117 --> 00:10:27,950 Su Lee! Su Lee! Come back 149 00:10:28,077 --> 00:10:29,908 Taro, please go and apologize 150 00:10:30,037 --> 00:10:31,186 - Apologize? - Yes 151 00:10:31,317 --> 00:10:34,036 Noto my faulto 152 00:10:34,157 --> 00:10:38,992 Never mind whose faulto it was! Go and apologize 153 00:10:40,597 --> 00:10:41,507 Ah prease 154 00:10:42,117 --> 00:10:43,186 Waito 155 00:10:43,317 --> 00:10:44,955 Waito 156 00:10:45,997 --> 00:10:46,986 Waito 157 00:11:01,117 --> 00:11:02,994 - Mrs. Courtney - Miss 158 00:11:03,117 --> 00:11:06,154 l'm Roger Kenyon... from the Education Authority 159 00:11:07,317 --> 00:11:10,036 l was told they were sending an inspector round 160 00:11:10,157 --> 00:11:12,955 - But l really didn't expect - He would be black 161 00:11:13,077 --> 00:11:15,193 - He would be so young - My apologies 162 00:11:15,637 --> 00:11:18,231 But the authority likes to check that the standards of the evening classes 163 00:11:18,357 --> 00:11:19,551 are up to par 164 00:11:19,677 --> 00:11:22,828 l can assure you that my standards here are well over par 165 00:11:22,957 --> 00:11:24,072 l'm glad to hear it 166 00:11:24,317 --> 00:11:26,990 Well Mr. Kenyon, if you'd like to come with me, l'll show you round 167 00:11:27,117 --> 00:11:30,996 No, no please! l'd ratherjust wander around on my own, if you don't mind 168 00:11:31,117 --> 00:11:33,790 l usually get a much clearer picture that way 169 00:11:46,037 --> 00:11:48,949 - Everything all right? - Everything's okay 170 00:11:49,317 --> 00:11:51,956 - We have agleed to differ - Good 171 00:11:52,077 --> 00:11:54,272 - Excuse me - Ah, our new African 172 00:11:54,917 --> 00:11:57,033 - Pardon? - Yeah, l've been expecting you 173 00:11:57,157 --> 00:11:58,988 - Me? - Yes, l was told l'd have a new pupil 174 00:11:59,117 --> 00:12:00,027 Look, it's nearly time for our tea break 175 00:12:00,157 --> 00:12:03,194 So why don't you just sit at the back for a moment, and l'll get your particulars later 176 00:12:03,557 --> 00:12:06,151 - But please... - Be a good chap! Don't argue, just sit down 177 00:12:06,277 --> 00:12:08,074 - All right? - Yes, but... 178 00:12:14,557 --> 00:12:16,513 - Sit? - Yes please 179 00:12:22,357 --> 00:12:26,987 O.K. Me sit! 180 00:12:46,157 --> 00:12:47,909 There you are! 181 00:12:48,037 --> 00:12:50,995 10 p! Thank you, that's it 182 00:12:52,117 --> 00:12:53,106 Next! 183 00:12:53,317 --> 00:12:56,036 - You sitta here - Merci 184 00:12:59,917 --> 00:13:01,794 - l get coffee - Merci 185 00:13:02,037 --> 00:13:04,232 - Coffee black? - Sank you please 186 00:13:04,637 --> 00:13:05,956 Coffee black 187 00:13:06,037 --> 00:13:09,029 - l'm gettada coffee for Danielle - Too bad 188 00:13:09,917 --> 00:13:11,509 - Sugar? - Merci 189 00:13:12,117 --> 00:13:14,028 How about a biscuit? You like a biscuit? 190 00:13:14,637 --> 00:13:17,515 - l would like that! - Good 191 00:13:18,037 --> 00:13:19,106 l'll be back 192 00:13:21,237 --> 00:13:22,829 A packet of biscuits, please 193 00:13:22,957 --> 00:13:27,189 Wait your turn! There's a queue here! Go on 194 00:13:30,037 --> 00:13:30,913 Next 195 00:13:31,317 --> 00:13:33,433 Gud efening 196 00:13:34,317 --> 00:13:40,074 - Yes, good evening! Tea or coffee? - Gud efening 197 00:13:41,637 --> 00:13:45,994 l heard you the first time! Tea or coffee? 198 00:13:47,237 --> 00:13:49,228 - Char - Ah, tea 199 00:13:51,037 --> 00:13:54,791 - Ten p. - Gud efening 200 00:13:55,037 --> 00:13:59,827 - Ten P. - l'll pay for that 201 00:13:59,957 --> 00:14:01,913 - And a coffee for me - And a coffee for you 202 00:14:03,637 --> 00:14:05,195 - Are you Mr. Brown? - Yes 203 00:14:05,917 --> 00:14:09,512 l've got a message for you from her ladyship 204 00:14:09,917 --> 00:14:12,989 - Lady who? - Miss Courtney! 205 00:14:13,117 --> 00:14:15,426 She's just been in here! She wants to see you 206 00:14:16,037 --> 00:14:18,107 - l know what she does want - Yes, Mr. Brown? 207 00:14:20,037 --> 00:14:21,231 You want to see me 208 00:14:21,357 --> 00:14:23,188 ln my office! Lmmediately 209 00:14:25,637 --> 00:14:27,832 - Careful, thats coffee! You'll spill it - Por favore? 210 00:14:27,957 --> 00:14:29,993 - That's coffee! - Gracias 211 00:14:35,157 --> 00:14:37,910 - Same again, please - Here you go Mr. Brown 212 00:14:38,037 --> 00:14:39,186 - Thanks - Thank you 213 00:14:39,957 --> 00:14:44,109 - A packet of biscuits, please! - l'm sorry, we haven't any left 214 00:14:46,037 --> 00:14:49,029 Good! You've come to have a cup of coffee? 215 00:14:50,037 --> 00:14:53,791 - Coffee? - Yes! Coffee, this stuff 216 00:14:54,917 --> 00:14:56,111 Thank you 217 00:15:01,117 --> 00:15:02,106 Enter 218 00:15:04,157 --> 00:15:08,514 lt has taken you 2 min 38 sec exactly to come to my office immediately 219 00:15:09,157 --> 00:15:11,034 l'm glad l didn't ask you to take your time 220 00:15:11,357 --> 00:15:13,029 l'm sorry! l was detained 221 00:15:13,957 --> 00:15:16,994 l thought l'd better tell you that an inspector has arrived 222 00:15:17,117 --> 00:15:19,233 - Well my conscience is clear - l beg your pardon? 223 00:15:19,357 --> 00:15:22,190 Apart from the odd parking ticket, l've never been in any trouble with the police 224 00:15:22,917 --> 00:15:27,991 - An education inspector - Oh, l'm sorry! How stupid of me 225 00:15:28,117 --> 00:15:31,951 Yes! Well he'll probably want to call in on your class 226 00:15:32,037 --> 00:15:33,993 Don't worry, l'll deal with him 227 00:15:34,117 --> 00:15:37,109 You don't deal with inspectors from the local authority, Mr. Brown 228 00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:40,035 You cossett them, flatter them and agree with everything they say 229 00:15:40,157 --> 00:15:41,988 Yes, l'll do that as well 230 00:15:42,117 --> 00:15:45,029 - l expect he'll want to see your register - My register? 231 00:15:45,917 --> 00:15:49,910 - You do have a register? - Oh, that register! Yes of course 232 00:15:50,037 --> 00:15:52,028 You'd better call it as soon as you get back to your class 233 00:15:52,157 --> 00:15:54,432 By the way while you're here 234 00:15:54,557 --> 00:15:57,196 The local authorities want me to fill in a few details about you on this form 235 00:15:58,037 --> 00:15:59,834 - l've got your name - Yes 236 00:15:59,957 --> 00:16:00,992 - Address - yes 237 00:16:01,117 --> 00:16:02,232 - Sex - Occasionally 238 00:16:07,117 --> 00:16:07,993 - Sorry - Married? 239 00:16:08,117 --> 00:16:10,506 No, l was engaged once! 240 00:16:10,917 --> 00:16:13,192 As a matter of fact, l proposed marriage but it didn't really work out 241 00:16:13,317 --> 00:16:14,545 There was quite a lot of opposition 242 00:16:14,957 --> 00:16:16,026 - Her father? - No, her husband 243 00:16:16,157 --> 00:16:17,431 l didn't realize she was married 244 00:16:18,357 --> 00:16:22,032 - What do you do during the day? - Nothing at the moment, l'm afraid 245 00:16:22,157 --> 00:16:24,990 - l'm waiting for a suitable position - And what was your last position? 246 00:16:25,117 --> 00:16:27,233 l was teaching at a secondary modern school but l left 247 00:16:27,637 --> 00:16:29,229 l couldn't stand any more beatings 248 00:16:29,357 --> 00:16:31,427 l didn't think teachers beat children any more 249 00:16:31,557 --> 00:16:32,910 They don't! lt was the other way round 250 00:16:34,117 --> 00:16:37,109 l think you'd better take this form, fill it in yourself and give it to me later 251 00:16:37,237 --> 00:16:38,192 Right 252 00:16:38,317 --> 00:16:40,035 And do be careful what you say to the lnspector 253 00:16:40,157 --> 00:16:41,033 Of course! 254 00:16:41,157 --> 00:16:42,988 Oh, by the way... the new student has arrived 255 00:16:43,117 --> 00:16:46,826 You wouldn't forget to add the name to the register, would you? 256 00:16:51,037 --> 00:16:56,430 Danielle, what you do hafter class? 257 00:16:56,957 --> 00:17:00,996 - l go back home to learn ze English - Hey l'm going to learn English as well 258 00:17:01,117 --> 00:17:02,516 Maybe we learn together 259 00:17:02,917 --> 00:17:04,953 - Yes but what about poor Max? - Yeah 260 00:17:05,037 --> 00:17:06,834 What about the poor Max? 261 00:17:06,957 --> 00:17:08,788 l'm crying my eyes out 262 00:17:10,037 --> 00:17:14,235 - l have an idea - l have lots of ideas 263 00:17:14,357 --> 00:17:17,429 Why not you and Max study together? 264 00:17:22,357 --> 00:17:25,190 All right class! Settle down please! Quiet! 265 00:17:25,317 --> 00:17:28,946 Now, the first thing we have to do before anything else is to call the register 266 00:17:29,037 --> 00:17:31,028 - Sorry - That's quite all right 267 00:17:31,157 --> 00:17:34,035 l expect you'll have a bit of difficulty finding your way round at first 268 00:17:34,157 --> 00:17:35,112 Things will seem rather strange 269 00:17:35,237 --> 00:17:37,990 - Yes, very strange - Yes 270 00:17:38,117 --> 00:17:40,108 lt must be quite a change coming from one of the under-developed countries 271 00:17:40,237 --> 00:17:42,034 To our more advanced way of life 272 00:17:42,957 --> 00:17:45,915 - Oh yes - Still, your people are doing remarkably well 273 00:17:46,037 --> 00:17:49,029 - Did you fly here? - Fly? 274 00:17:49,157 --> 00:17:50,909 What do you mean, Bwana? 275 00:17:52,917 --> 00:17:54,987 Fly! ln a big iron bird 276 00:17:57,117 --> 00:17:59,028 Quite a change from riding an elephant 277 00:18:00,237 --> 00:18:02,034 Unless you came by Jumbo 278 00:18:04,357 --> 00:18:08,987 - English joke - Very funny 279 00:18:09,637 --> 00:18:11,036 Perhaps you'd better sit down 280 00:18:11,157 --> 00:18:13,034 Now, l'm gonna call out your names 281 00:18:13,157 --> 00:18:15,990 - Will you please answer present - Present 282 00:18:17,917 --> 00:18:20,431 Yes Ali, but wait until l call your name out 283 00:18:20,557 --> 00:18:21,512 Sorry please 284 00:18:21,637 --> 00:18:25,152 - Ranjeet Singh - Present and correct please 285 00:18:25,957 --> 00:18:28,187 - Giovanni Cuppello - Si proffessori 286 00:18:28,317 --> 00:18:30,990 - No Giovanni! Not proffessori - No proffessori 287 00:18:31,117 --> 00:18:33,028 No, you should address me as Sir 288 00:18:33,157 --> 00:18:34,112 - Sir - yes 289 00:18:34,957 --> 00:18:38,108 Now l understand 290 00:18:41,237 --> 00:18:43,797 You have been togetta knotted 291 00:18:51,117 --> 00:18:53,108 Come again 292 00:18:54,157 --> 00:18:57,035 To become a Sir! You got Knotteda by the queen 293 00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:01,947 The word is knighted! And l'm not that kind of sir 294 00:19:02,637 --> 00:19:04,116 Maximillian Papandrious 295 00:19:04,957 --> 00:19:06,515 Maximillian Papandrious 296 00:19:06,917 --> 00:19:09,829 - Mr. Brown is speaking to you - ls he? 297 00:19:12,317 --> 00:19:18,028 - Oh sorry, you want something? - Are you here or not? 298 00:19:22,317 --> 00:19:24,035 Sure l'm here 299 00:19:24,317 --> 00:19:26,990 - Taro Nagazumi - Ah so 300 00:19:31,637 --> 00:19:32,911 Plesento 301 00:19:33,157 --> 00:19:35,034 - Anna Schmidt - Ja, present 302 00:19:35,157 --> 00:19:37,546 - Su Lee Chung - Plesent 303 00:19:38,157 --> 00:19:40,830 - Ali Nadim - Gift 304 00:19:44,037 --> 00:19:46,995 - Gift? - l'm surprising you, no? 305 00:19:48,157 --> 00:19:51,513 Each day l am learning new English word 306 00:19:52,157 --> 00:19:56,787 And l am finding that gift is another word for present 307 00:20:02,117 --> 00:20:04,506 - Very ingenious - Thank you very much 308 00:20:04,637 --> 00:20:10,030 - Danielle Favre - Presente and l'm all here 309 00:20:12,117 --> 00:20:12,993 l can see that 310 00:20:14,037 --> 00:20:16,107 - Jamila Ranjha - Ranjhi 311 00:20:16,917 --> 00:20:19,795 Gud efening 312 00:20:20,237 --> 00:20:23,991 - Yes, you're here! And Juan Cervantes - Por favore 313 00:20:24,357 --> 00:20:26,109 - Present - Por favore? 314 00:20:26,237 --> 00:20:28,114 - You are here - Present 315 00:20:29,957 --> 00:20:32,915 l'd better take down your particulars otherwise l may get into hot water 316 00:20:33,037 --> 00:20:35,790 You are going to have a hot bath? 317 00:20:37,157 --> 00:20:40,035 No Ali, it's just another way of saying l may get into trouble 318 00:20:40,157 --> 00:20:44,992 Oh dear! You have been committing some grievous misdemeanour? 319 00:20:45,357 --> 00:20:49,111 Not at all! There's an inspector from the local Education Authority coming round 320 00:20:49,237 --> 00:20:51,034 - The big boss - Yes 321 00:20:51,157 --> 00:20:51,953 l suppose you could say that 322 00:20:52,037 --> 00:20:54,505 But from my experience they're usually interfering old fogies 323 00:20:56,317 --> 00:20:58,512 - You don't like them? - Not particularly 324 00:20:58,637 --> 00:21:01,515 Frankly, they're quite useless and they are as outdated as their teaching methods 325 00:21:02,117 --> 00:21:03,914 l mean, what is the point of learning past participles 326 00:21:04,037 --> 00:21:05,516 Cognate objects or subordinate clauses? 327 00:21:05,917 --> 00:21:08,033 Far more useful to try to teach foreign students 328 00:21:08,157 --> 00:21:10,193 how to order a meal or find accommodations 329 00:21:10,317 --> 00:21:13,514 - You appear to have some unique ideas - l suppose l have 330 00:21:13,917 --> 00:21:17,512 - You know you speak English fairly well - Thank you 331 00:21:18,317 --> 00:21:19,545 What is your name? 332 00:21:20,037 --> 00:21:23,029 - Roger Kenyon - Roger Kenyon 333 00:21:23,557 --> 00:21:24,990 Ah Miss Courtney! 334 00:21:25,117 --> 00:21:27,506 l'm just completing the register and getting the details of our new student 335 00:21:27,637 --> 00:21:30,435 Before that inspector chappie pokes his nose in 336 00:21:30,957 --> 00:21:31,992 Oh, no! 337 00:21:32,117 --> 00:21:34,028 - Mr. Brown - l shan't be a moment Miss Courtney 338 00:21:34,157 --> 00:21:36,193 - What is yourjob? - lnspector 339 00:21:37,117 --> 00:21:38,436 What local transport? 340 00:21:41,117 --> 00:21:43,426 Local Education Authority 341 00:21:47,237 --> 00:21:48,955 l thought he was the new student 342 00:21:49,037 --> 00:21:52,552 - The new student is a female - ls she? You didn't tell me that 343 00:21:53,037 --> 00:21:57,110 My apologies Mr. Kenyon, l do assure you that Mr. Brown will be severely dealt with 344 00:21:57,237 --> 00:22:00,229 l can't remember when l last enjoyed myself so much 345 00:22:00,357 --> 00:22:02,188 - l beg your pardon - Enjoyed yourself? 346 00:22:02,317 --> 00:22:05,514 You know Miss Courtney, your Mr. Brown is a remarkable man 347 00:22:05,957 --> 00:22:07,185 - l am? - He is? 348 00:22:07,317 --> 00:22:12,186 Yes! His teaching methods may be revolutionary but they appear to work 349 00:22:12,637 --> 00:22:15,947 l've always encouraged my staff to be forward thinking 350 00:22:19,317 --> 00:22:21,035 l'll pass on your comments to the Authority 351 00:22:21,157 --> 00:22:23,193 Perhaps they'll revise their textbooks 352 00:22:23,317 --> 00:22:27,230 Now if you'll excuse me, l must put in an appearance at the other classes 353 00:22:30,037 --> 00:22:31,106 Very well 354 00:22:31,237 --> 00:22:35,788 Keep up the good work, Mr. Brown and thank you very much for the coffee 355 00:22:36,637 --> 00:22:37,990 l'll come with you Mr. Kenyon 356 00:22:41,157 --> 00:22:43,990 Blimey you are dropping a clinker 357 00:22:46,917 --> 00:22:49,829 - You mean clanger - Yes please 358 00:22:50,037 --> 00:22:52,835 Yes right! Let's continue with our lessons 359 00:22:52,957 --> 00:22:55,517 Get out your textbooks! l'm going to give you all a few exercises 360 00:22:55,637 --> 00:22:58,231 Scusi professori sir! l cannot do any exercises 361 00:22:58,637 --> 00:23:00,912 - Why not? - l gottada bad back 362 00:23:03,037 --> 00:23:04,993 Excuse me! l was looking for... 363 00:23:05,117 --> 00:23:07,995 Ah, at last! A pity you didn't arrive half an hour earlier 364 00:23:08,117 --> 00:23:09,186 Why? 365 00:23:09,317 --> 00:23:10,227 You might've saved me a great deal of embarrassment 366 00:23:10,357 --> 00:23:11,836 With a certain African gentleman 367 00:23:12,157 --> 00:23:14,910 Yes, he was the inspector but l mistook him for you 368 00:23:15,037 --> 00:23:17,073 - You thought a gentleman was me? - Yes 369 00:23:17,237 --> 00:23:20,229 The silly fool pretended to be a student, sit in the back to catch me out 370 00:23:20,357 --> 00:23:21,790 But l saw through him 371 00:23:22,157 --> 00:23:24,034 l gather you think he was a bit stupid 372 00:23:24,157 --> 00:23:25,988 Definitely, thick as a brush 373 00:23:26,117 --> 00:23:27,835 - Was his name Mr. Kenyon? - Yes 374 00:23:28,037 --> 00:23:29,993 - Do you know him? - l should do 375 00:23:30,117 --> 00:23:33,189 l've come to collect him! l'm his wife! 376 00:23:34,917 --> 00:23:38,830 Oh blimey yes!